Slytherins Can't Joke
by Irique
Summary: Narcissa gets a rose brooch. Abraxas sent it to Lucius, on the orders of his wife. The school starts talking. [ Lucius x Narcissa ]


A/N: Not mine. None of it.

**Slytherins Can't Joke - 1970**

It was almost dinner time when Lucius finally found Narcissa. He'd been looking for her all day, but she'd proved to be quite elusive. Lucius stood at the top of the front staircase, resting on an elbow. He thought he looked quite good, which was way he had posed himself this way.

Narcissa was walking passed with a group of her friends, joking and laughing with them. Evelyn Parkinson spotted Lucius, and nudged Narcissa. The entire group of girls looked up at Lucius, bursting into giggles as he flashed them a dazzling smile.

Narcissa rolled her eyes, said goodbye to her friends, and climbed the stairs to her best friend.

"You charmed?" Narcissa asked, giving him a smirk to rival his own.

"Do you know how long I've been looking for you?" he countered.

"No, I don't. How about you tell me?" she replied, holding her books out to him. "We have time, while you carry my books back to my room."

Lucius took her books without protest, or even thinking otherwise, as it would seem, and began the trek back to Slytherin house.

"I got a parcel from my father today. Well, my mother actually. Did I tell you that she's pregnant?"

Narcissa grinned at Lucius.

"You're rambling. And yes, you did," Narcissa observed, poking him.

"Right," Lucius said, with a nod. "Well, mother sent me something. For you." He looked around, as they entered the dungeons. When he was satisfied that no one was around, he pulled a box out of his robes, and handed it to Narcissa.

Narcissa took it, opening it slowly. She knew if it was from Lucius' mother, it was going to be expensive, and most probably fragile. Her eyes widened when she saw the contents of the box. A rose brooch, that looks like it was made from ruby, peridot and platinum.

"Oh Lucius, it's gorgeous," she exclaimed, her whole face lighting up. Lucius grinned back at her.

"Good. Mother hoped you would. She likes you a lot, you know."

They didn't have to even utter the password, as a couple first years hurried out just as they were about to go in. Narcissa shot glares at them as they almost knocked into her.

They walked in, settling down in front of the main table. A few second years sitting nearby scattered as soon as Narcissa glanced at them. She had quite a reputation in the house, with the majority of her influence coming from Bellatrix, Lucius, and the Lestrange brothers.

Lucius dumped Narcissa's books onto the low table in front of them, eliciting a stern look from Narcissa. He fixed her with a sweet smile. Narcissa turned around and glared at a group of girls who could be heard audibly swooning of Lucius' good looks.

"It's not attractive if he can hear you," Narcissa addressed them loudly, practically hissing at them. Lucius continued to look at them after Narcissa had turned around, and had to smirk at the looks the girls were now shooting Narcissa.

He glanced at Narcissa to find her virtually steaming. He sighed, returning his gaze to the girls.

"Off you go, now," Lucius told them, shooing them on with his hand. "Go find something constructive to do."

The girls looked rather disappointed that Lucius was backing Narcissa up, and slowly slunk away, possibly hoping that he would call them back.

It wasn't going to happen. If Narcissa wanted them gone, he was going to comply every time.

"Want me to pin it on?" Lucius asked Narcissa, gesturing to the brooch.

Narcissa nodded, holding out the box to him. He took it off her, sinking down onto a knee in front of her. A deathly silence fell over Slytherin house, as everyone looked on at what very much looked like a marriage proposal.

Lucius rolled his eyes, but complied and opened the box for her.

"Ciss, will you fake marry me?"

Narcissa suppressed a giggle, before putting her hands over her mouth.

"Yes! Oh yes!" she exclaimed, loud enough so the whole common room could hear her, before launching herself into his arms, hugging him tightly.

"Three, two, one," Lucius counted under his breath.

Narcissa pulled away from Lucius, rolling her eyes, as the sound of applause, and hysterical sobbing, rang out through the room.

"Oh please, grow a brain, the lot of you. We're not getting married. So yes, you can stop crying, you silly little girls," she snapped at them, blue eyes glinting with annoyance. "Now, shoo."

They shooed, and Lucius resumed his position in front of her.

"Honestly, you'd think they wanted us to get married," he observed, as he pinned the brooch onto her robes, careful not to prick her with it.

"It's just that we look so pretty together," Narcissa replied with a smirk.

"Yes, well, we can't help that, can't we?" Lucius was about to continue when his stomach rumbled. "Hmmm, shall we continue this later, after I've fed the monster?"

"Sure," Narcissa replied, with a nod.

And with that, they headed back out of the common room, down to dinner, where they would be greeted with continuous questioning about their engagement.

That was the last time they ever tried to have a joke with Slytherin house. It was official. Slytherins just couldn't take jokes.


End file.
